My safest place is my own creation. It is a mental retreat, a cognitive reality, where I can exist without trouble. It is immune from every attack; spiritual, emotional, or physical. Within such walls, I am loved, appreciated, respected, significant, and I belong. I am worthy of the highest affection. I am a child, but I am also a god.
My safest place is a bunker deep in the middle of the largest, hottest desert. It is huge, but barely visible as it sits level with the surrounding sands. Yes, it is air-conditioned, but my favorite features are on the outside. It is no mere ivory tower; it is a fortress created for my ego to rest.
Surrounding the bunker are my boundaries maintained by an unseen force with an ultimate desire to love and value me. At least 200 yards out swirls a wall of sand circling with hurricane force winds. This wall serves as a warning to all who pass that they must be nice to me. In fact, the wall will only harm you if part of you harbors any ill-will towards me. If you are seeking me out so that I can fulfill some need of yours, it will not let you pass, whether I want it to or not. If you are not coming their for me, me when I am at the most selfish, then you are not welcome.
Within the wall of sand is a large pillar of fire. The fire is my favorite feature due to the fact that is the most threatening and the most protective. It is a purifying fire. I mean no harm to anyone, but this will harm you dearly if you choose to approach it with any other motive besides love for me. If you want me, it will burn you. If you merely like me, it will burn you again. If you are willing to criticize me, it might even kill you. In fact, if you merely came to be silent and listen to me it will still burn you, because every person knows that listening involves much more than being silent. If you came to relate your life story to mine, you will not make it past the first step. Even if, unbeknownst to you, that you will lie, emotionally manipulate, argue, or fight for any of your own control or rights in the bunker, you will be reject here first. The fire is a brilliant ego check on all who enter. None can fool it. You are either their for me, in my world, or you will be harshly rejected.
Lining the inside of the pillar of fire is a soft pillow of clouds. Thicker than a snow storm of dandelion pedals, it quiets every noise for me and comfortably dims the heat and light. And within that comfort, lies my bunker.
It is a magical place, filled with objects and space and time that arranges itself according to my wishes. I can do no wrong within it. I cannot hurt a soul, nor can they hurt me. No angry words are spoken there. There is no drama, no gossip, no liars, no manipulators, no challenges. Here I am valued, protect by the forces outside me. Here I am loved, comforted by my surroundings and the environment created for me. Here I am respected, without argument or conflicting personalities. Here I am appreciated, where my creations hang on the walls, sit on the floor, as beautiful and perfect as they are in my mind. Here I can exhale, close my eyes, rest and relax with selfish freedom. Here I am safe.
