Sunday, June 19, 2011

Pros and Cons of talking about addiction

Con:
If I admitted or talked about my addictions, then...
  • Everyone would assume I am "an addict" without question or doubt, including all conclusions and consequences thereof.
  • Everyone would assume I am incapable of intelligent thought outside of my addiction.
  • Everyone would assume I am incapable of good behavior outside of my addiction.
  • Everyone would assume any intelligent thoughts or good behaviors were a rare exception to my life, outside of my addiction.
  • Everyone would assume my life should revolve around treating my addiction.
  • Everyone would assume that my admission of addiction means I am asking for their help/advice/sympathy/empathy.
  • Everyone would assume that I am depressed and/or failing at my life because I am an addict.
  • If I told a doctor that I'm an addict, then I would be immediately committed to a psych ward or treatment facility.
  • If I told a doctor that I'm an addict, then all of my current medications/treatment would cease.
  • If I told a doctor that I'm an addict, then they wouldn't look into anything else in my life besides addiction.
  • If I told a doctor that I'm an addict, then they would be primary concerned with protecting their malpractice lawsuit ass when prescribing medication/treatment.
  • If I told a doctor that I'm an addict, I would get their boss's bureaucratic "recommended" treatment rather than actual help.
  • If I told my friends or family that I'm an addict, they wouldn't know what to say or do.
  • If I told my friends or family that I'm an addict, they would recommend that I go to a doctor for treatment.
Pro:
If I hid or denied my addictions, then...
  • Everyone would assume I am not "an addict" without question or doubt, including all conclusions and consequences thereof.
  • Everyone would assume I am capable of intelligent thought.
  • Everyone would assume I am capable of good behavior.
  • Everyone would assume my intelligent thoughts and good behavior were normal.
  • Everyone would assume my life revolves around me.
  • Everyone would assume I'm fine without their help, and in fact, they could come to me for help.
  • Everyone would assume I'm happy and successful.
  • If I didn't tell doctors, then I could continue living in my own house, with my own food, be able to travel, and sleep until noon.
  • If I didn't tell doctors, then I could renew medications and avoid "talk therapy" advice without any trouble.
  • If I didn't tell doctors, then I wouldn't have to deal with red tape, paperwork, forms, "approving authority" stamps, signatures, and other masturbations of public employees.
  • If I didn't tell friends and family, then they wouldn't find themselves too ignorant to help "an addict."
  • If I didn't tell friends and family, then we could all communicate and relate as people.

....hmmmm... yeah, fuck everything about "admitting I'm an addict". Addicts are lepers. I'm not a leper.

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